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That's right, its the return of daily updates! Enjoy my desperate attempt to pretend Halloween can last for 2 months and enjoy some art and articles (I swears) in the meantime. (Oh and it's never too late to send in a picture of your Halloween costume to get painted. I've got plenty but chances are I'll have time to do yours!)
December 25th: Good times. One last costume (because I forgot to paint my partner in crime) and then...articles (or at least talk thereof)!
You might recognize her from the same picture I posted when I did the painting of myself.
On the topic of Articles: The answer is yes. I was a slack bitch for them this past year and I need to get back up to speed. I'm a bit busy this Xmas day, but my goal is to get all these things typed up and out over the next week or so. So, for New Years expect lots more. Oh and Damn, daily updates are fun. I may have to get back into do that again now that the bug has bitten me. Happy Halloween (Or whatever holiday you're celebrating these days) and play nice.
December 24th: Lots of Art! Merry Christmas!
So let's get started. Do you know the website Bogleech.com? It's run by a fellow monster fanatic named Jonathan Wojcik. Long story short, he's got a fictional world he's created with a horde of original monsters. You can find them here on his Mortasheen page. I have a few favorites and, well, I decided to paint them. Below you'll find his original images for reference followed by my own little ink doodle version. (Oh and hopefully Jonathan's cool with the cross-posting, otherwise these'll vanish pretty quickly because I forgot to ask and it's Christmas Eve right now. :crosses fingers:) You really should check out the Mortasheen page...there are "stories" and histories to these guys and, well, most of Bogleech.com is pretty freaking cool.
Since I'm still technically celebrating Halloween, let's start with Wojcik's "Jekyllantern". It just makes sense.
Wojcik's "Grauch" may be my favorite monster of his...it combines my love for monsters with too many teeth, giant eyeball(s), and Mummies.
Wojcik's "Babayaba", with a slight reference to Baba Yaga's awesome chicken-legged hut.
Yes, it is a witch's cauldron + toad.
Wojcik's "Brainpan". Gotta love critters who live in skulls.
Gotta love the Mortasheen..but we must move on. Let's see what costumes you guys sent in this year:
Dexter and his sister from Dexter's Lab. I...went with a more traditional look.
By the by, this is the same guy who dressed up as a Dinobot last year. Classy.
Bonus points for dressing in official Kingdom of Loathing gear.
How often do you see "Where the Wild things are" cross swords with Tank Girl?
Halloween Costume made out of Duct Tape?
Business Casual never looked so good.
That's it for Halloween Costumes. If I didn't get to you this year, well, I saved everything I didn't use. Just saying. Now for some Monsters:
Ah, Cloverfield. In another couple years people will forget and you'll be the dark horse of the Kaiju movie night.
Have you seen the movie Link? You need to. It's a quirky horror film about chimpanzees murdering people and strangling animals. Somehow it seems....timely.
Who doesn't love a mutant bear movie? Click here if you don't know what I'm talking about.
William Shatner versus Ernest Borgnine as a satanic goat man who melts. God Damn the Devil's Rain is an awesome movie.
Finally...I did not paint yet another Monsterpocalypse painting. Nope. Not a chance.
(But were the above such a thing, know that that's much, much cooler than the beast it was based off of.)
December 21st to 23rd: Santa is coming! (Not a porn reference nor a shout-out to the chick tract "Sancho is coming")
Seriously, lots of stuff on the way. Patience and then sugar plums shall dance in your head. Moshing, most likely.
December 20th: A total aside or: What I randomly did this afternoon on a whim.
If you don't play Dungeons & Dragons, at least know that it has some pictures of zombie santas in it.
December 19th: The Deadly Mantis
Not a Monsterpocalypse painting, I swears.
In other news, did you watch the Alice remake from the SciFi Channel? Here's the new White Rabbit, painted in 60 seconds as part of an art challenge:
December 18th: I formally boycott my Toyota.
Technically, he's a Super Hero but anyone outside of Japan would consider him a Monster. Dear God, Japan, why?
December 17th: Halloween Costumes Return: With an Edge.
Who doesn't want to be a great white ninja?
December 16th: The Meatball Machine
You have no idea how hard it was to make the monster from "Meatball Machine" cute. God that's a screwed up movie. Where else can you see a girl with alien parasites mutating her so she can fire exploding genitalia from her fist orifice cannon? Thank you Japan.
December 15th: The Queen
When I was a kid, there was this terrible cockroach movie (out of the dozens of killer cockroach movies) called "The Nest". It was all about super-evolving cockroaches (yes, like the ones from Mimic) that eventually started to evolve to be like humans. Sort of. The movie was terrible but the monsters at the end were....pretty special. When I was 10 I had nightmares revolving around the Queen they find at the end. I think it has something to do with some other animal riding around in the flesh of my dead loved ones. Now that I'm an adult (sorta) I know that that's not scary, that's awesome. Thus the painting.
Oh and more Halloween Costumes tomorrow! Send yours in if you haven't already!
December 14th: The Trilogy of Terror Doll "Thing"
My God, it's the killer doll that started it all.
December 13th: Lobsterfrogman?
Yet another amazing KoL critter.
And my version:
If you don't get it, you're playing the wrong game online.
December 12th: Where's Woldo?
If you read this website regularly, I can only hope you're familiar with Kingdom of Loathing.
Yes, he's a combination of Waldo from those books and Voldo from Soul Caliber. Which amazing. Here he is with a bit more flesh:
December 11th: A Total Aside for Friday. Thank you, Dark Horse Comics.
Sweet God, I may have to get back to reviewing comics sometime.
That is, in a word, amazing.
Yeah, I'm speechless too.
(Oh and reviews, while late, are coming just in time for Christmas. I didn't forget, I just got lazy.)
Oh and yeah, because I don't have anything to upload today, enjoy yet another Monsterpocalypse Tribute:
Yeah, I'm weird. Sorry. Back to Halloween Horror Tomorrow. As a bonus:
No more Monsterpocalypse Art. Bad Jared, Bad!
December 10th: I am not a shrimp, I am a King Prawn!
The whole point of the movie was that the Prawn aren't monsters, but they still technically count.
Also their super-weapons throw cows.
If you don't know the movie, shame on you.
December 9th: The Snakeman is coming for you, Mister President.
(Not a threat against the president, but rather a quote from the film Dreamscape, where a giant Dream Snake monster/serial killer slips into the president's dreams.)
If you haven't seen the film Dreamscape, you need to fix that right away.
December 8th: Head Injury Theater is having technical issues...as in my German Internet provider can't explain why my internet connection vanishes for days on end. As such, it's hard to keep to a daily update schedule. I'm still doing it but, as you can see, some of these are for the FUTURE, just in case. Lord I hope that makes sense. In the meantime, enjoy some more Horror-themed fun.
December 7th: The Best Terrible Movie you haven't seen? No, but it does have it's charm:
If you haven't seen the movie "Syngenor", don't blame yourself. It's terrible but it is good enough to share with friends. Filled with slow-moving mutants, terrible cliches, an over-acting Corporate CEO, and topped off with monsters that explode when exposed to water, it's an amaaaazing film. Here are a few quick doodles.
December 6th: Nickelodeon used to have monsters too. They were real?
Me confessing my strangle love for the nicktoon "Aaaaaaaah! Real Monsters" is not something I look forward to doing. I may do it one day but...yeah. It's like saying you used to like Rugrats. No one's proud of that crap.
December 5th: I lied. Just one more, this one was a commission, I swear!
December 4th: A Hint of things to come....
Have I been doing this for almost 7 years and still never gotten around to talking about the Child's Play series? I need to fix that. Soon.
December 3rd: For the Kaiju Dorks only.
This is Cyber Khan:
He's a giant robot from the UberCorp, which is a consumer whore/robotics company (within the game Monsterpocalypse). As such, I couldn't resist.
No more Monsterpocalypse starting tomorrow...I know my addiction is something I need to take care of.
December 2nd: My what big (Eight) eyes you have...
I KNOW they're supposed to be spider webs, but I can't shake the feeling someone out there made a Fairy Tales-themed Bukkake video somehow. Obviously, I have problems.
Remember my rambling about Monsterpocalypse? Here are two more monsters from the game (There will be one more after this and then I swear we'll get back to normal non-geek critters...sort of.). These are Mogroth and Anglax. Considering my love for deep sea anglerfish men (painted on the site some dozen+ times by now), it's no wonder that I dig him. (Images above belong to the Monsterpocalypse guys and are used for comparison purposes...don't sue!)
December 1st: Become a Gold Member Today!
I'm sure there were also party photos, but when all I get are Webcam snapshots, I begin to worry.
November 30th: Are you ready for Freddy?
I think the knife in the kidney is a nice touch.
November 29th: Hellgirl? (and a zombie schoolgirl)
See, Zombie Schoolgirl. Buy now and we'll include the "Dirty Dishes in the Sink" playset at no extra cost!
(Come on. You know that's a bargain.)
So what was I excited about yesterday? Could lightning strike twice?
...The Trend continues. Geek Girls rule, obviously.
(By the by, the Elfish looking person next to Hellgirl is "a character of my friend's own design" so, well, they got included in the painting.)
November 28th: Let's Flip for it.
The tradition of young ladies making positively bad-ass costumes of male characters continues. Check this out...it boggles my mind, but still rocks.
Wow. Just Wow. Is this what love feels like? Lady Two-Face, I salute thee, mightily.
November 27th: The Friday Most Black.
Yes, someone went "Classy" with their slasher costume. Historic, even.
November 26th: Swoop Love Steal Grandma!
Holy Crap. Someone dressed as a Dinobot. That's awesome. Since this picture was leftover from last year, I doodled 2 for this one, out of weird artistic guilt.
Dinobots kidnap Grandma! Dinobots Best! Rawr!
(And I thumbnail this one because I'm not too proud of it)
November 25th: We have so much to show you.
I can't remember if I ever painted Pinhead from the Hellraiser series, but chances are if I did I didn't paint him like this. I'm a huge fan of the series, even the later sequels which featured kung-fu cowboys prominently. That's not a joke.
Yet another photo from last year (this is Empress Zurg with Laser eye), I never did get around to doing this one justice. Not sure I have even now, but hey, enjoy.
November 24th: Posting this a little early because my Internet Connection is dying and it is making life difficult, particularly for young boys such as myself who are trying to update daily.
November 23rd: All hail Empress Zurg!
You have to love female versions of male characters. For several reasons obviously. I'll be vague and complimentary because the above person is pretty cool and keeps sending me awesome photos.
November 20th-22nd: (I've an anniversary to go celebrate, so today I hope these tide you over while I leave the studio & celebrate with my old lady.) Oh and if you haven't sent me your costume yet, by all means do so. I'll be painting these until Christmas!
Yes Batman, your fears are correct, my milkshake DOES indeed bring all the boys to the yard
She also sent me a picture of her with a cat mask on, but, well, yeah. I'm weird and went with the half-costume notion.
A little set-up...I got this email about a week ago:
"Hello Jared, I know it's a little late but I thought you may enjoy my son's costume this year. When I asked him what he wanted to be at first he said he COULD just wear his iron man costume again, but I told him he could be whatever he wanted. His face lit up and he accuired a devious grin and exclaimed "El Chupacabra!""
If I ever have kids (NEVER!), I can only hope they're as cool as this guy here. And Kudos to the parents for letting their kid go as the Mexican Goat Sucker. That's....fantastic.
November 19th: I'm feeling Randy (Randy is the name of the guy in the 2nd picture below.)
This is kind of a cheat, because I just stumbled onto this photo. That's April Flores a.k.a. "Fatty D"...erotic performer on the right there as the Queen of Hearts on the set of an Artcore Alice in Wonderland production/scene. I....had to be indulged. My apologies. Also here Sort of Safe for Work Twitter page is here, which I link to because, well, it's sort of safe and she's pretty cool....she had an art show featuring plaster molds of her naughty parts. Which is amaaaaaaaaazing.
This is Randy. He's into expensive shoes, long walks on the beach, light bondage, and "just chillin' with his friends." I wonder what Bondage Halloween Randy has to say?
November 18th: Dr. Zombie
This zombie was made with 7 herbs & spices.
More tomorrow (real tomorrow) but I wanted to post this early since I won't post the OTHER stuff until late. In unrelated news, my lame rejected interview is up on the BLOG if you're interested. You're not, but curiosity will get the better of you.
November 17th: Green Lantern Meets I'm a Terrible Person
First off, I'm a terrible person. Dear Mario, I'm sorry.
I....I started doodling and, well....yeah.
In less "me feeling like a terrible person" regards, please enjoy a bad ass costume of a Green Lantern. If you don't know who Green Lantern is...I don't blame you. I pity you, but there's no blame.
Great costume and really great execution. To share because that photo doesn't really illustrate how great the costume itself is beyond theme lighting:
Makes me feel really bad about having signed that contract with Sinestro a few years back. Stupid super-villains and their contractual obligated vendettas.
Monster of the Day: Shameless Cross-Promotion!
Click the above picture to see the Swag! I mentioned this earlier on Twitter (Yes, I use it more than I should) but wanted to log/pimp it on the site official. Do you play the game Kingdom of Loathing? (Click Here if you don't.) It's the game that has the forum that had the people that got me into sharing my Art online. This year I did both a picture for their 2010 Calendar as well as the Christmas Card you see above. Not much else to say but hey, check it out if you want a really weird Xmas card to send to your Mom this year.
November 16th: My Precious!
Not much to say. I'm a fan of "retro" Gollum from the old animated film, but I'm a monster-addicted freak, by all accounts. Oh and sorry for the delay in getting this up. Got distracted yesterday by vigorous misbehaving.
November 15th: The Dumbest Godzilla Monster?
Monster of the Day: Gabara!
A lot of people (kaiju fans) will debate what the dumbest giant monster is. Time and again, "Gabara" comes to the forefront. I don't necessarily agree, but "Godzilla's Revenge/All Monsters Attack" is a film that takes place entirely within the mind of a whiny little Japanese boy. There's more to it than that, but check out the movie. It's terrible. It features "Baby Godzilla" who blows smoke rings and is human-sized and, in the American version, talks like Bullwinkle the Moose. It's amaaaaaaazing. Oh and Gabara has a weird child-molestation vibe. He likes to fondle young monsters...his magic horn helps him touch them. It's....creepy. Or maybe it's just me. I'll stop typing now.
Oh and feel free to suggest some more monsters....lord knows I'll run out of ideas sooner than I care to admit.
November: Saturday the 14th (A great movie and I'm posting this early because it really makes me happy):
Someone sent me this picture:
So how could I resist?
Happy Holiday Horror, everyone.
November: FRIDAY THE 13TH! (More on that later.)
Keep the pictures coming folks. They're awesome and I'm still shocked at what you dress your kids as. It's freaky.
I may have zoned in on the wrong thing with this photo.
You can't hear the SKREEEEEEEEEEEE noise it's making, but it is very annoying.
Monster of the Day: Twilight Sparkle Vampires
I got a LOT of requests to paint Twilight Vampires and...no. I may spend some time making fun of them later, but...yeah. I'm more amused at the idea of your more traditional Vampire getting his fangs into a Glitter Goth Fangirl. That and I slightly feel the Twilight Scene has been beaten to Death. Until it sparkles. And plays baseball.
November 12th: Day 2: Me in a Gimp Mask!
I am....not proud. Don't ask how we came up with the idea.
Mom, if you still check the website, I'm so very sorry.
Special thanks to all the hot ladies (my wife included) who ended up wearing the ears that night.
It's adorable until the Bat swallows.
Monster of the Day: Grindix Birvikaan
(And yes, today I remember I'm supposed to explain these things.)
Geeks come in all varieties and while I've been doing a lot of Dungeons & Dragons stuff, my 1st love is always plastic toys. D&D releases some of the best, but there's another passion of mine that's pulled me into another game: My love of Giant Monster movies, Kaiju if you will. There's this game from Privateer Press called Monsterpocalypse that, while I see it as financial folly (seriously, it's an expensive game to even get started with) it's a folly that I happily welcome, like most geeks with some money to burn...or friends who own gaming shops who indulge you a bit too much. (You know who you are.) Some of the monsters are your standard Giant Robot or Alien fare, but others....well, they're special. While I was tempted to paint the Giant Deep Sea Anglerfishman (because I love those things), the giant cyborg molemen who breed industrial giants really, REALLY strike my fancy. Here's a picture of the miniature for "Grindix Birvikaan" (Mr. Birvikaan to his employees) that for the sake of surreality I photoshopped onto a child's playground. (Image mostly the property of Privateer Press, for reference/review purposes.) Check this thing out:
It's so ridiculous that it borders on bad-ass.
I have two months of monsters so, hell yes some of them are going to be obscure. But I will explain them as they come...for better or for worse. Grindix Birvikaan, I salute you, drill-bit-abomination that you are. For those not in the know, he's a Subterran Monster bent on blotting out the sun so the Molemen can take over. Does anyone wonder why I love this game sometimes?
November 11th: Halloween Begins! (Sort of.)
So yeah. Deadlines and what-not had me thrown off my schedule. So to protest Christmas decorations going up in the Mall before Halloween had even come, I'll be updating the website in a Halloween Fashion each and every day until Xmas morning. That's right, daily updates. Think of it as karmic payback for being a slacker.
(Speaking of slacking, more D&D Stuff is up on the site: CLICK HERE. )
So, let's start easy with some inks. Nothing much, but it's a start. As with tradition, we start with someone wearing fishnets.
I'm so glad that "Hot" is a legit costume choice for Halloween.
This next one? It's...weird.
The hell is this? Unicorn attack or....oh my.
The costume is dedicated to a toy dedicated to a Narwhal who stabs penguins & koalas? That's both awesome and, well, troublesome.
He's from the Future and he wants your candy.
By the by, feel free to send me your Halloween costume photos if you haven't already. It's been a slack holiday so far and I need some penance in my life. Oh and as for tradition:
Monster of the Day: Nemesis Enforcer.
Seriously, I have to keep this up for 2 months so you'll forgive me for scraping the bottom of the barrel early on. If you don't know who he is, more power to you. Not knowing is half the battle.
And there you go. Enjoy some of my Halloweens of Yesteryear!
...and maybe a touch of ye olde Head Injury Christmas. Still with my own terrible voice!
Copyright 2008 Jared von Hindman or maybe just Jared Hindman. It depends. Any images used that are not Jared's are used via Fair Use review purposes and belong to their respective owners....who are nice people that don't want to sue me.
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